Harry Kane

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This is facepalm stuff. I wonder who wrote it for him, and how long ago it was written. I think it was intended as a strategic Spurs/NFL/American fan base piece of PR, but it's also clearly working as a wee souvenir for some Spurs fans. Fair enough. Cringe central, but fair enough.

I wonder if this will become the trend - commemorative, ghostwritten articles to mark players' career milestones? I could do a good line in that pish.
Just for a laugh do a mock one of Alan Hutton celebrating 20 red cards.
 
Everyone owes it to themselves to read this.

Zero to 100 | By Harry Kane

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I thought it was great.
Why? This is not even the work of a journalist hack, this is some 'digital content writer' tasked with the following: 'we need a piece that links Spurs with the NFL involving Harry Kane and using a journey arc - take care to reconcile his Woolwich beginnings by framing that information in a paternal story of resilience. Here's his agent's phone number.'

American Digital Content Writer: 'sorry, who are Spurs? What is Woolwich?'
 
Why? This is not even the work of a journalist hack, this is some 'digital content writer' tasked with the following: 'we need a piece that links Spurs with the NFL involving Harry Kane and using a journey arc - take care to reconcile his Woolwich beginnings by framing that information in a paternal story of resilience. Here's his agent's phone number.'

American Digital Content Writer: 'sorry, who are Spurs? What is Woolwich?'
Because it is a good read. Even if it is not written by Harry himself with a number 4 pencil it is still a look into his psyche and character and the drive that has made him one of the best strikers in the modern game. Harry obviously loves the NFL so complaining about him mentioning that is just a waste of time.

Football players obviously have interests outside of football otherwise they would go insane.
 
I also love him. I just sicked in my mouth a bit reading that shite. I couldn't believe the brass neck of it all. But I've learned something. If people want to believe it, they will. Ah, fuck it, I already knew that...
By putting his name to this kind of stuff surely makes a decision to leave for Madrid more difficult? That’s my take on it.
 
Because it is a good read. Even if it is not written by Harry himself with a number 4 pencil it is still a look into his psyche and character and the drive that has made him one of the best strikers in the modern game. Harry obviously loves the NFL so complaining about him mentioning that is just a waste of time.

Football players obviously have interests outside of football otherwise they would go insane.
How the fuck am I the cynic? These cunts are taking you all for fools. There was a meeting some weeks or months ago where a bunch of spivs got together and decided that you were thick enough to digest any old Harry Kane pish they could peddle.

Fuck me, I've even read some cunt go on about the beauty of the Poch Malbec image. Fuck my arse man!

'hey, Josh, I'm writing this item about an English soccer player and part of the client's remit is that I replace his father with his soccer coach but I'm not sure how to do it. I mean, he's from Argentina and the client didn't even specify how good his English was. Any ideas?'

'Argentina? I had a really nice wine from Argentina in that steak house over on 23rd last week.'

'Josh, you're amazing!'

'What? Whadda say?'
 
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