Never Mind The B*llocks

6th October 2012 | Blog, Never Mind The B*llocks

We shoved it up United; we shoved it up The Sun

Like the rest of you, I spent last weekend in a big mushroom cloud of ecstasy (no, not the narcotic, although the effect was much the same.) Tottenham shirts were all over the place in London, as we all high-fived each other and scoured the globe for any United fans we knew. I even rang up a lad I haven’t spoken to since secondary school, just because I had ran out of Utd fans to throw obscenities at. Ring ring. Utd fan; “Hello?” Me; “3-2! Suck on that! Suck it!” Utd fan; “Who’s this?” I put the phone down as... Read more »

4th October 2012 | Blog, Never Mind The B*llocks

Media making AVB our baby

The media hatchet job on Andre Villas-Boas has become a joke, and on Saturday evening AVB added the perfect punch line. Given the way he celebrated it’s a shame a few choice members of the press weren’t stood a yard in front of him because they could do with an overhand right to the face. They have tried to ridicule our boss and used the Lloris situation to back him into a corner – and no one puts our baby in the corner! I was indifferent to the new manager’s appointment when it was first announced. Even though Harry Redknapp’s... Read more »

2nd October 2012 | Blog, Never Mind The B*llocks

From Brad to Good

Do you hear that sound? That faint scratching noise in various press rooms across the country? That my fellow Tottenham fans is the sound of journalists struggling to come up with the latest Andre Villas Boas crisis headline. When the full time whistle sounded at Old Trafford, Spurs fans across the country were finally able to send a 23 year old back perching monkey off to a nice home in the country. I love a Gary Lineker stat, but that stat is one that I will be delighted to never hear again. If like me you have watched, MOTD, Goals... Read more »

26th September 2012 | Blog, Never Mind The B*llocks

We’re Probably Definitely Going to Beat United

As a Spurs fan there are supposedly three certainties in life; coming away from a trip to United with no points has long been one of them. The statistics are trotted out every time we head to Old Trafford but they bear repeating again. Since Big Ears poached the winner against the Red Devils in 1989, a total of four points have been picked up there; none coming as a result of wins. Of course, those statistics mask some typically-Spurs turns of fate which have conspired against us and led many to believe our visits to United are cursed. The... Read more »

26th September 2012 | Blog, Never Mind The B*llocks

Drawing a Line

Being from the US I may not have been supporting Spurs for nearly as long as most of you. But in my time being Tottenham, the decline of the vocal, passionate, laissez faire fans who were happy just simply being Tottenham is rather alarming. The noise at the Lane is on a steady downward trajectory for all but the biggest of occasions. In its place are the newer, success hungry, seemingly instant gratification requiring clients have been the order of the day, as evidenced by our first three home games this season. The boo birds have been out in force.... Read more »

24th September 2012 | Blog, Never Mind The B*llocks

Tottenham Till Half Time

The anger and disbelief that swept over me at the end of 45 minutes took me totally by surprise. I had just witnessed mass mediocrity, a gigantic void of intelligence, a cataclysmic lack of faith and the inability of individuals to stand together in moments of difficulty. It had been 45 minutes of pure unadulterated nonsense from those sat in the North Upper. Yes the team was bad, but the few hundred Spurs fans around me had been worse. The man to my right turned up seven minutes into the first half carrying a hotdog, bottle of coke and a... Read more »

24th September 2012 | Blog, Never Mind The B*llocks

Tales from the 1882

The 501 coach from Exeter to Heathrow pulled into its destination at 16:15 on a sunny Thursday afternoon in September, the 13th to precise. I stretched my lanky limbs and began to remove my kneecaps from my eye sockets, where they had been wedged for last 5 hours because the seats on the bus do not really accommodate my frame. A loud beep from a nearby car alerted me to the presence of my Father, and just so I knew it was him and not some other 50 year old, who looks like me, but fatter, older and with a... Read more »

23rd September 2012 | Blog, Never Mind The B*llocks

Our Bovine Public

I was told just recently that it wasn’t a writers job to be liked, but to challenge the way people think. That said, it seems that while the majority of our clubs fan base have spent the best part of the start of the season pointing fingers at one another, passing around ‘the blame’ quicker than Danielle Lloyd through the Spurs dressing room, the real issues have been cast to one side, ignored. We have a new coaching staff, style of play, shuffled squad and attitude about the way we progress; yet expectations aren’t being properly managed. Tottenham Hotspur Football... Read more »