Jermaine Jenas Tourettes

I have Jermaine Jenas tourettes. Every time he is named in the starting line up I say “f**k sake Jenas”. Every time he passes sideways or backwards when there is a forward pass on I say “f**k sake Jenas”. Every time he stupidly gives the ball away I say “f**k sake Jenas”. All he does is pass sideways and backwards and ‘f**king round about a bit’. Put simply, I don’t rate him and seeing him play for Spurs makes me angry.

However, it shouldn’t be like this. How can a man who ran the show and was outstanding when we beat the scum 5-1 in the League Cup semi-final make me angry? How can a man with a great scoring record against the scum make me angry? It’s because he is a massive waste of talent.

He has all the attributes to be a top midfielder. He’s quick, athletic and he has an eye for goal. He can even play a defence splitting forward pass when he wants to (unless I dreamt that last bit). Not knowing him personally I don’t know whether this is down to a lack of desire or a lack of confidence (but as Spurs fan said on twitter, can he be lacking in confidence with a wife like his?!).

(Jenas in last season’s away kit)

If he was demanding the ball and constantly driving forward he could dominate midfield and be an important part of the team (see the 5-1 game). Unfortunately what we normally get is the “Jenas danger pass” where upon receiving the ball from a team mate under pressure he passes it straight back and the “Jenas 360” where he bursts forward on a counter attack, shits himself and turns around 360 degrees and ruins the counter attack.

When Martin Jol signed Jeans for £7m he was buying potential. Unfortunately that potential has not been realised.

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