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If Harry got the England job…

3 min read
by The Fighting Cock
At the time it seemed an inspired appointment. The FA dillied and dallied for the best part of three months, but when they announced on 1 May that Harry Redknapp was the new England manager a nation rejoiced. The written press, in particular, was ecstatic at the decision, having long trumpeted Harry’s credentials over lesser […]

At the time it seemed an inspired appointment. The FA dillied and dallied for the best part of three months, but when they announced on 1 May that Harry Redknapp was the new England manager a nation rejoiced. The written press, in particular, was ecstatic at the decision, having long trumpeted Harry’s credentials over lesser lights such as Roy Hodgson, a man with no FA Cups to his name and who had only managed three national sides previously.

Perhaps the only set of fans with any reason to lament Redknapp’s inevitable elevation to national messiah were Spurs supporters, who had watched in horror as the great man allowed uncertainty over his long-term position as Tottenham manager to wreck a promising league campaign. Immediately after Capello’s resignation on 8 February, Tottenham steamrollered Newcastle at home, winning 5 nil. They cemented their third-place position; 7 points clear of Chelsea in fourth and 10 points ahead of Woolwich in sixth. At that point they seemed nailed on for Champions League football in 2012-13. Everyone knows what happened next.

Never mind. Soon after the season ended Spurs supporters were jubilant when Pep Guardiola made the surprise decision to suspend his planned season-long sabbatical and accept Chairman Daniel Levy’s offer of taking up the reins at White Hart Lane. ‘The prospect of working with such great players as Gareth Bale and Luka Modric was too great to turn down. I am excited to continue the football traditions of Tottenham laid down by Sir Bill Nicholson,’ stated Guardiola. ‘I have already spoken with Lionel Messi and he is keen to join me in north London,’ he added.

[linequote]With Rio Ferdinand and John Terry forming the heart of the defence, Joe Cole adding some sparkle on the wing and Peter Crouch providing the cutting edge, Team England seemed destined for glory.[/linequote]

So, it was with their new manager that the Three Lions set off for Polkraine with spirits high and the nation behind them. New assistant coach Jamie Redknapp made no attempt to dampen expectations when he claimed on the eve of the tournament that, having seen his cousin (and new England captain) Junior Lampard help defeat Barcelona and Bayern in the Champions League already that season, the continentals held no fear for a squad brimming with talent and experience. Indeed, with Rio Ferdinand and John Terry forming the heart of the defence, Joe Cole adding some sparkle on the wing and Peter Crouch providing the cutting edge, Team England seemed destined for glory.

Such expectancy only added to the shock and disappointment as England were bundled out of Group D with three consecutive 1-0 losses, each characterised by defensive naivety and dodgy officiating. The eventual tournament winners France overcame the loss to injury of their most potent striker Karim Benzema after John Terry’s crude tackle in their opening game, defeating Germany on penalties in the final. John Terry’s red card in the France match, and subsequent three match suspension for dangerous play, has given the former England skipper extra time off to prepare his defence for today’s trial at Westminster magistrates court.

However, Redknapp knew the real reasons for England’s early exit from the Euros: ‘Despite taking a triffic squad over to the tournament we were undone by lady luck. Once we lost JT we were really down to the bare bones. And as for those chances that fell to Crouchy? Well, my Rosie – God rest her soul – would’ve stuck ‘em away.’

[author name=”garpat” avatar=”https://twimg0-a.akamaihd.net/profile_images/1139106876/image.jpg” twitter=”garpatt” tag=”garpat[/linequote]

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5 Comments

  1. Essexian76
    11/06/2012 @ 1:20 pm

    And then I won the EuroMillions, the next morning I awoke only to find Nigella had run out of orange juice (again), what a crap breakfast

  2. alf
    11/06/2012 @ 1:33 pm

    “as the great man allowed uncertainty over his long-term position as Tottenham manager to wreck a promising league campaign”

    Yes. Harry kept picking himself to play Centre Midfield which was clearly a mistake.

    He is too old to play there.

    He should have left it to our multi million pound world class squad to deliver the goods.

  3. spursguv
    11/06/2012 @ 1:39 pm

    I’ll finish off the half sentance…”if Harry got the England Job..we’d be going home from the euro’s before we kicked a ball.

  4. realgonespurs
    11/06/2012 @ 1:56 pm

    Defoe on with 3 minutes to go in the first game, 6 minutes to go in the second game & after furious anti Redknapp chanting he bites the bullet and puts Defoe on with 25 mins to go & he bags a hat trick, alas by then the group was all decided & our win didnt change anything.

    Redknapp reflects on the disaster with

    “The lads were triffick, you couldn’t ask for more, I pay no heed to England fans who are not happy, they are all idiots, theyve never had it so good, before I came they had not won fook all since 1966, England fans will just have to accept the national team is shit and will never win fook all as Spain/Germany/Holland will be stronger next tournement & we cant compete with that…. I’ll be looking to speak with the FA about a 10 year contract when I get back home but I’ll have to be a bit carefull because I just found out David Bernstein’s has contracted genital warts & he wanted it kept private.”

  5. David Graniewitz
    13/06/2012 @ 6:21 am

    An entertaining read. The thought of Pep Guardiola as Spurs manager is the stuff that wet dreams are made of.

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