January 2013 Transfer Window DISCUSSION Thread

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willian has an afro, holtby doesn't

has it not occured to you that avb's end goal is to field a starting XI of afros?

lloris is just filling in for gomes until he grows his hair

walker can grow an afro, as can gallas, caulker and of course benny on the left.

2 holding midfielders of sandro and dembele of who can both grow afros, we have hudd as back up just in case.

on the right wing, we have lennon. bale will be sold in the summer because of his non afro nature so we'll have townsend on the left who can grow an afro

ade up front which just leaves us with the no 10 position and willian is the final piece of the jigsaw!!! i thought it was blatently obvious and hence why willian is worth £20m and upwards
 
Nope...with the cash Bale would bring in, it would be someone equally impressive or the strong likelihood of equal or greater potential. Holtby is a AM with a diverse set of skills/roles and would add considerable depth to the already existing squad.

Like we did with the Berbs, Modric money?

Nah my Bale replacement bit was in jest but I do think he's off in the Summer
 
Like we did with the Berbs, Modric money?

Nah my Bale replacement bit was in jest but I do think he's off in the Summer

I agree, but I still (want to) believe that if we finish top 4, and strengthen the squad (ie. add players like Holtby and Damiao :avbpray:) he will stay and play out his contract...or go in January if we get knocked out at group stage.



EDIT: and besides...La Liga is not a good league, especially if you take out its two horses. :baletroll:
 
Why can't Kaboul grow an afro??!?

77681880-thumb-300x342.jpg

Because shit like this happens......
 
I could see Levy being reluctantly dragged kicking and screaming into paying a premium for Moutinho because of the unique factors at play: his history with AVB, the particular crucial value of a quality, high-energy playmaking CM, the odd lack of other serious bidders.

Interesting set of factors. Almost persuasive except one must not forget this is Levy. Levy does not kick and scream for anything. If his grandma was kidnapped and threatened with beheading, he'd counter offer AND low ball the ransomers.

He is Spock-like in his behavior when it comes to deal making. This is for better and for worse.

As for Willan, I agree, there is no way he's gonna play a bidding war and the like for that guy.

In the end Levy's wheelhouse is the bottom line. No matter the other circumstances if it doesn't work on paper for the club, he is immovable.
 
Interesting set of factors. Almost persuasive except one must not forget this is Levy. Levy does not kick and scream for anything. If his grandma was kidnapped and threatened with beheading, he'd counter offer AND low ball the ransomers.

:levyeyes:: "Yes, hello, this is Daniel Levy."

:adeninja:: "We have taken your grand-mother. If you value her life, you must send 35 million Euros to the following Swiss bank account..."

:levylol: : "Euros? Are you mad? What kind of kidnapper demands Euros, what with half of Europe about to collapse? Not to mention, it would be much easier for me to access pounds sterling. Exchange rates are a nightmare, after all!"

:adeninja:: "That would suffice. 35 million pounds or we ship you her HEAD!"

:levywtf: : "Oh come on you fool, are you trying to jack the price up on me? You can't very well demand 35 million Euros, then increase your demand to 35 million pounds!"

:adeninja:: "I... I'm sorry, I don't understand. 35 million pounds OR ELSE!!!!"

:levystare:: "Ah, you see, it's all to do with exchange rates. After all, a US dollar is not worth a Euro, is not worth a pound. By current exchange rates, demanding 35 million pounds is equivalent to demanding over 43 million Euros! The equivalent in pounds sterling would be 28,393,188.88, according to today's rates."

:adeninja:: "WHO GIVES A SHIT! Listen, send the money or else. I don't care if it's 35 million Euros or 28 million pounds, JUST GET US THE FUCKING MONEY!!!!"

:levywtf: : "My dear, I can tell you've never done this before... Don't you understand how negotiation works? You make an offer, and I low-ball that offer with my counter-offer. After several iterations we eventually meet in the middle."

:adeninja:: "Are you trying to tell me you won't pay?"


:levystare:: "10,000 pounds..."

:adeninja:: "What?!?! You think we won't do it?"

:levylol:: "Oh, I know you won't, because then you lose all of your leverage."

:adeninja:: "20 million pounds, or we will start shipping body parts to you!!!"

:levystare:: "Oh how horrific!!! But you see, I've never even really liked the cunt. When I learned to drive, all of the popular kid's grandparents bought them a BMW or Mercedes when they turned of age. All my grandparents gave me was a used Austin Allegro. Do you understand how difficult it is to lose your virginity driving one of those pieces of shit?!"

:adeninja:: "I... That's horrible. OK, 17.5 million pounds and it's a deal."

:levylol:: "AHA!! So you DO know how to deal. Sadly, I'm only getting started! My previous offer was 10,000 pounds. I'll increase that to 125,000 pounds."

:adeninja:: "Are you sadistic? What kind of man values his grandmother in this way?"

:levystare:: "That's a very generous offer. Think of all that you can do with that money. I only tell you this because I've already noticed from your accent that you are Albanian..."

:adeninja:: "You what??..."

:levywtf:: "I'M NOT FINISHED!!!! As I was saying, the GDP per capita of the Albanian citizen is roughly 4.5k USD. Let's see... adjusting for exchange rates... long division... Ah yes, that comes out to about the year's salary of 45 of the average Albanian citizen. So, you see, you can feed an awful lot of your underlings with that amount of money. I would hardly guess that your organization truly employs 45 individuals however, that number of employees in the business of organized crime begins to become unmanageable, what with simply too many people talking and bragging about the money they're making, trying to impress young hot tight-bodies. I would generously estimate that an individual of your obviously limited experience in kidnapping has, hmm... a dozen employees at most?"

:adeninja:: "Ah, what? HOW DID YOU KNOW... I mean, 10 million and we'll call it a deal."

:levyeyes: : "HA! Listen, I'm getting tired of this. I'm a very busy man and I'm trying to build a new stadium. I'll tell you what. I appreciate the effort that you've put into this deal, so I'll respect that by offering you rather more than I would have in any other situation. 750,000 pounds and it's a deal."

:adeninja:: "THIS IS OUTRAGEOUS!!!!"

:levylol:: "Oh good, I'm glad you think so. You see, as soon as you picked up the phone, I had my contacts in the government begin to trace the call. You see, I was thoroughly expecting a minimum layer of protection and security, and did not seriously think that you would call me from an unsecured line, but it turns out that you did, and now an SAS team is standing outside of your door, ready to breech and clear the room, so surely you see at this point that you don't have that many options. In light of that fact, I'll make my final offer, and that is 750,000 plus David Bentley. He is a rather attractive fellow. I think you'll find that he worth his weight in gold, at least so long as he is in the business of prostitution, and not football!"

:adeninja:: "I... fine. We have a deal."



And yes, I actually googled "shitty british cars" in order to discover the Austin Allegro.
 
:levywtf: : "My dear, I can tell you've never done this before... Don't you understand how negotiation works? You make an offer, and I low-ball that offer with my counter-offer. After several iterations we eventually meet in the middle."


That entire thing is one of the funniest things I've ever read, congratulations, I award you 3 Internets.
 
schalke fan on holtby:

Hello all,

I'm an S04 fan so I figured I'd register to clear up some of your questions etc ;)

Also, I follow Tottenham in England and have been to WHL several times to see them play, so as I'm resigned to losing him I hope that he does end up at Tottenham. :)

-Someone said that he has played as a winger for us, and this isn't true. He played in the DM last year as a ball winning mid / deep lying playmaker (to use Fifa terms), though he was used on the wing on occasion for Mainz.
- He has been playing as AMC this year and been thriving in the role, but his favoured position is actually DM so Spurs could be signing him with a view to playing there (perhaps in the 4-3-3 formation
- I have seen the website stating he is a good dribbler / likes to dribble and I don't know where this has come from, he is not a player who runs with the ball much. He is capable of beating a defender, but 9 times out of 10 he will play the pass or a through ball.
-Many have been saying 'is he good enough to start' and 'is he an improvement on the current squad' and the simple answer is yes. I think it's likely that we will see Sandro/Parker, Dembele and Holtby playing behind Bale, Lennon and Defoe.
-Don't expect Moutinho to sign as well they take up the same position.
- His playing style is most similar (though I hate to say it) to Wilshere and Modric though he is a better ball winner than both of those
- I would expect him to sign a pre-contract deal also given how much we all know Levy likes his bargains, plus Schalke don't want to be rushed into making signings in January and would rather take until the summer to scout out a replacement and January deals aren't common in the Bundesliga.
 
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